Some believe that experiencing love in our generation starts with a few persistent Instagram likes, a TikTok direct message, or a simple follow. In today’s age, love that was once sparked by chance, encounters, or face-to-face conversations has now been transformed into the mystical and magical world of digital dating. Central Cee’s recently released single, “Gen Z Luv,” speaks on some of these modern-day dating trends, offering a lens through which we can better understand the current state of love and how technology has changed how this generation connects – romantically and beyond.
“When our children ask us how did we meet, I’m telling them Gen Z love, FYP love, IG love, saw her on the Explore page I need to explore deeper...” That’s the hook of Cench’s viral new single. These lyrics are a very fair portrayal of how Gen Z navigates the idea of love from a technological standpoint. We steadily rely on technology to solve most of our problems nowadays and loneliness is clearly one of them. Unlike previous generations, who often met through mutual friends, social settings, or even unexpected encounters, which are dubbed “meet-cutes,” Gen Z quite literally has the whole world at their fingertips and acts as such. But is this a good thing, or is it an abuse of technology?
As a generation, we have this overwhelmingly deceptive feeling that we have so many options because of how many people we see when we doom-scroll on Instagram and TikTok at night or swipe through Hinge profiles in the morning. Our mothers and fathers didn’t have that amount of access and exposure. When they met someone they thought was physically attractive, interesting, and worth their time, they were more likely to commit to them and lock them down in fear of them slipping away. But with Gen Z and digital dating, we see the opposite. We see more of a fear of commitment due to a constant yearning for something or someone that is seemingly “better.”
When I think of Gen Z love, I always relate it to the relationships people in my life have formed. For instance, many of my friends have met some of their boyfriends through a few Instagram likes. In a group chat with some of my friends, I asked them what Gen Z Love meant to them. Four of my best friends, Mary, Leonora, Kathleen, and Bianca, shared their thoughts on the topic.
“Call me a Millennial because there’s no way I’m telling my kids their dad hit me up on IG and said, ‘Yo,’ and I folded,” Mary rants. She and Kathleen had similar points of views, as Kathleen types, “Gen Z Love? More like Gen Z lust. People really believe that liking IG stories is enough for someone to know that they like the person…”
Bianca, who has a more positive outlook on the idea of Gen Z love, mentions, “Gen Z love gave me my first boyfriend, someone I am coming to love – although I am the exception, not the rule. Gen Z love is not how prince charmings are found; maybe frogs, though!”
Finally, Leonora types, “Gen Z love can have different outcomes depending on the people. Meeting someone in person rather than online doesn’t guarantee the relationship’s success rate. I met my boyfriend in person, but we grew our relationship online because of distance—so it has its perks.”
Analyzing my friends' responses made me realize how the accessibility of potential partners through technology is both a blessing and a curse. I simply can’t pick a side. Although it opens up a world of possibilities, it also diminishes the beauty of genuine and authentic relationships, reducing them to likes, follows, and messages. Nowadays, a lot of people believe sending a like on an Instagram story is a way of "shooting their shot" and implying they are interested in you. Although dating apps are still a thing, your chances of meeting up with someone and dating them can easily begin with seeing them on social media and taking your chances.
When it comes to the good ole dating apps like Hinge, Tinder, and Bumble, I do believe that they essentially lessen the organic touch to building connections with others and that the interactions are usually superficial. But, we can’t deny that people have met their long-term partners and even spouses on there. Yes, these apps are driven mainly by appearance and first impressions rather than shared experiences or values, but we have to realize that not everyone is extroverted or enjoys putting themself out there at a bar, club, in class, coffee shop, etc. So, hiding behind a phone may be a blessing for some people who prefer to swipe and like.
One aspect of Gen Z love that really throws me off is the pressure to maintain a relationship’s image on social media. This just further complicates the situation, as many feel that a relationship isn’t “real” until it’s posted and publicly validated. We have coined the terms “soft-launch” and “hard-launch” when explaining the phases of posting your special someone on social media and solidifying the relationship. Not sure when dating became a marketing rollout…
I don’t believe the formula for Gen Z love will change anytime soon. With the way the younger generation, Gen Alpha, have now been labeled as “iPad Kids,” they might start finding their future partners on Roblox – lol. Algorithms and digital interactions have become the new norm for meeting partners. The current trend shows no signs of reversing, which shows that future generations may continue to rely heavily on technological means for finding love. Gen Z dating culture is a product of the times we’re living in. Due to its technological advances, it raises the question of the depth and authenticity of these connections.
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